Lettuce

Yesterday's corner time: 6 Minutes.

I am turning into a man of taste and sophistication.

Obviously, my new girlfriends are very impressed and today, Whats-her-name was rendered speechless when I presented her with a lettuce.

I think she was perhaps somewhat overwhelmed having led a particularly insular and unadventurous life, unlike myself of course.

“Why have you given me a cabbage?” she asked.
“It’s a lettuce,” I replied.
“Why have you given me a lettuce?” she asked.

See what I mean? Completely clueless. Anyway, I persevered.

“It’s a token of my admiration,” I explained.
“Oh,” She said.

I think she was quietly impressed. None of the other boys had given her a lettuce before.

That evening, I told Dad that I had taken his advice and given Whats-her-name a lettuce.

It later transpired that his advice had actually been to present her with some love letters as opposed to a love lettuce.

Not for the first time, not even for the second time, Dad's advice has again proved useless.

He really should learn to speak more clearly - it’s playing havoc with my love life and the content of his sandwiches.

Matthew.

Related Posts:

Whats-her-name: Pastures New, Breaking up is hard to do
Dad's Advice: Infatuation, Emily, Overbearing