Wood and Peace

Yesterday’s corner time: 5 Minutes

Sometimes, I believe that I should be sent to strife-torn regions as a peace envoy.

I’d soon whip them into shape and after I’d worn out the whip, I’d employ some of my tried and tested diplomacy.

In my experience, these situations can escalate very quickly and can soon get out of hand.

For example, when Dad threatened to pinch a piece of my toast at breakfast yesterday, I threatened to smear jam all over his face. Dad glanced around and swiftly armed himself with the honey.

We were on the brink of a nasty and sticky conflict. Someone had to step back and take the mature approach.

But before I could say a word, I found myself reeling backwards. A thick, gooey globule was trickling down my left cheek. I’d taken a hit.

I had two options: retaliate or offer the olive branch. I didn’t have an olive branch. I had a couple of sticks from the garden. Would they do? I quickly retrieved them and launched them at Dad.

They connected with the back of his head causing him to sink to his knees in surrender.

It appears that olive branches aren’t essential and that any old lump of wood will do the trick.

Matthew.